I was in the kitchen doing dishes while Cindy-Lu Hoo clung to my legs and whined for me to entertain her. I asked her to go get her cereal bowl so that I could wash it as well.

"Sure!" she said as she ran out of the kitchen, happy to be doing something.

"Here go, Mommy!" And she handed me a handful of cereal. That she had scooped from her bowl. And carried, dripping, all the way from the living room to the kitchen. So that I could wash it. 

****

Eeyore has an ear infection and its really hurting him. I took him to our new doctor (who I absolutely love!) yesterday and they gave him an antibiotic and also froze a wart off his hand. He wasn’t very happy. We stopped at Wal-Mart to fill the prescription and I let him pick out a candy bar. Whatever he wanted. He asked if he would be able to eat it all at once or if he could only have a little at a time. I told him that since he was so brave he could have it all at once. He chose a half pound Hershey’s bar. He had it eaten in about five minutes. He was much more cheerful after that.

I’ve been so busy the last few days that I haven’t had time for all my favorite internet bloggy buddies and I miss you guys! However, I do have lots of EXCITING! NEWS! (not really, don’t get your hopes up!) to share with you. This post would work much better using bullets, but because I just used bullets on my last post I have to wonder how long y’all would continue coming back if I kept writing with bullets? The answer, I would guess, is not very damn long. So, I’ll write in paragraphs, just don’t expect one paragraph to flow neatly into the next, because all this? Totally doesn’t tie in together.

So, now that you’ve been warned, lets start with ugly people. I just got back from Wal-Mart and it never fails that at some point during my visit I will be horrified by the ugliness of some person shopping there. Seriously, what is it about Wal-Mart that brings out the uglies in people? You just don’t get that kind of horrid disfigurement anywhere else. And I’m not talking about people going there in their jammies with unwashed hair. I’m talking about people who are JUST. SO. FUCKING. UGLY. you can’t stand to look at them. Where do these people come from? (And I know I’m not a pretty little princess, but at least both my eye balls stare straight ahead, my mouth doesn’t droop, my teeth aren’t brown, and my nose isn’t 3 miles long or 6 feet wide.)*shudder*

Now lets talk a little more about Wal-Mart. Did you know that you can buy boneless skinless chicken breasts for around $5-6 a pound. OR you can buy a fully cooked rotisserie chicken that can feed four for just $3.88. OR you could buy 8 pieces of fried chicken for less than $5? I mean, seriously. What kind of moron is going to buy the more expensive meat and then COOK IT THEMSELVES? That’s just dumb. So, yeah. We’re pretty much subsisting on fried chicken or rotisserie chicken. Its nice.

And here’s something that has zero to do with Wal-Mart. Cleatus? He done pissed me off. He did something that was so stupid and so dumb and makes me so FURIOUS. But, wait. Here’s the kicker. I can’t blog about it! Because SOMEONE can’t know that what he did PISSED me off. Because then I would feel even more SOMETHING than I do right now. And I’m not sure what pisses me off the most about it. The fact that he did it (REALLY PISSES ME OFF) or the fact that I can’t blog about it (STILL REALLY PISSED OFF)! Anyway, he did apologize, I know that he didn’t mean any harm when he did it, and I did forgive him but I’m still mad. So does that mean I really forgave him? Or did I lie? Because its not like I hate him or anything ANYMORE, but when I think about it I want to hurt him. And call him names. The good part of all this is that I can now freely call him names without feeling guilty. Not that that really stopped me before, but still…

And the last thing. I have a new BFF. Before I say who it is, I want to acknowledge that these other gorgeous ladies are still my BFFs, but now there is someone new. So, old BFFs, just think of it like this: when you have a child your heart fills right up with all the love. And then you have another child and does that take away the love from child one? No! Your heart grows. My heart just grew a little bit for another blogger. Swistle. I’ve always loved her blog, but now? Now I have her to thank for what is soon (HOPEFULLY!!!!!) to be my new baby. How is Swistle getting me a mac? Well, she’s not. But, she did blog about the Couch to 5K running program and when I told Cleatus that me and Eeyore were going to start it he said that he didn’t think I would stick with it, blah blah blah, and now if I do? I get a mac. He’s not to worried that he’ll actually have to pay up, but I don’t think he understands the depth of love I have for a mac. I will do anything, even sweat, for a mac. (And, yes, I am still doing the gym if you were curious. Going pretty good actually!)

Now, lets all just keep our fingers crossed that I don’t run into any ugly people the next time I’m at Wal-Mart, really enjoy my fried chicken for dinner, don’t call Cleatus to many names this evening, and run my ass off tomorrow. The end.

I am sick. I can not form paragraphs. I leave you with bullets.

• Go check out the contest over at 5 Minutes for Mom. But, please don’t enter. Because y’all know how much I deserve to win this contest.
• There is a man that works at the Wal-Mart deli. I think he is my soul mate. He remembers what I want every time I step up to the counter (and I don’t go THAT often), and he remembers Cindy-Lu’s name and always offers her a cookie. Nobody else in the deli ever has given cookies out before. He also knows how I want my meat sliced and GET THIS he can tell "by the look in my eyes" when I am hungry and he will give me a slice of Sara Lee Honey Roasted Turkey (my standing order) while I wait for him to finish slicing it. And you know what? He never gets it wrong. If I’m not hungry he doesn’t offer me a bite, but when I walk up to that counter and I am hungry he immediately hands me a slice and tells me he could tell from the look in my eyes.
• Did I mention that I’m sick?
• Cleatus read that post from way back when about how I was looking for an apartment and calculating my child support and now he thinks I want a divorce. I told him I didn’t. I’m not sure he believes me.
• T hasn’t been around much lately. I’m sure you guys miss him. (I swear I did not cause him any bodily harm. He’s just been busy. Or something.)
• I have a new post up at GNMParents.
• I really want to make the move over to Wordpress. I have my own domain and wordpress is installed and all that, but I just don’t know CRAP about CSS and therefore the design? Sucks so bad that I won’t make the move ’til its all better. I got a quote from Sam at Temptation Designs and now just have to convince Cleatus to let me pay the girl. Here’s where you come in: Email him and tell him how cool wordpress is and what bee-YOU-tee-full designs Sam comes up with. And then tell him he has a really large penis and a small nose and he is totally not balding. I am NOT kidding. His email addy is mm_mm_good80ATyahooDOTcom. Thanks ladies! (Just don’t tell him I sent you.)
• So, yeah, I don’t really feel very good.
• Cindy-Lu likes her mama’s most favorite food. Its Stove Top Stuffing with a twist. You dump the dry mix in a microwaveable bowl, add water, a slice of american cheese (or two) and dump some hot sauce on top. Stir it up and microwave it for a minute or two and VOILA. The most yummy comfort food ever!

DUDES. I did something that I was so scared to do. I did it about a month or two ago and I never told anyone. As soon as I did it, I regretted it. I KNEW that all my hopes and dreams were about to be CRUSHED.

But, um…they weren’t. My hopes and dreams? They are prancing around on the back of a unicorn with rainbow colored hair and it is raining cupcake sprinkles and, and, and LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY PINK FLOWERS AND FLUFFY LITTLE BUNNIES!

I submitted my blog for a review. And I got a really good review. And I jumped up and down and screamed so loud that I woke up my sleeping daughter. And I scooped her out of bed and danced with her. And then I called my mom and woke her up and told her all about it and told her I was sorry for waking her up, but I really wasn’t because MOM, DID YOU HEAR? I GOT A REALLY GOOD REVIEW!

And here it is. The link. To the review. THE REALLY GOOD REVIEW.