Oh my fucking fuck. I am so stupid. What the hell am I doing? That Emily Rose? She is one scary bitch. Cleatus is sleeping and there was nothing on TV so I searched On Demand to see what freebies were in there and lo, there is a spooky movie, I must watch it.
WRONG, BITCH. You don’t wanna watch this shit. But, I am! I am watching this shit! And it is on right this minute and because there is no one else to hold my hand or tell me when I can I remove my hands from covering my eyes, I come to you. I feel less scared with you, internet. We will watch together.
You seein’ this shit? Creepy.
(Oh, by the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS, Y’ALL! Way to celebrate the birth of baby Jesus! Watching a flick about exorcism. Happy Birthday, Jesus!)
Crazy shit. Craaaaaazy freaky shit. Freaky, creepy, spooky shit.
So what do you all think? Can demons possess people? Are there all these creepy assholes floating around just waiting to invade our bodies?
I’m going to say no. Mostly because I don’t believe that demons can possess people. Or that demons exist. And a little bit because, dudes, I have to go to bed soon and LALALALALALA FINGERS IN MY EARS THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS DEMONS LALALALALA.
(By the way, if you wake up at 3am tonight you better RUN. Or pray. Or just do what I plan on doing and that is to find a real sharp knife and slit your wrists. May as well get it over with. No sense in dragging it out, right?)
More freaky shit. Can’t type and hide my eyes at the same time. Must go find my pillow and bury my head to muffle the screams.
13 Comments so far
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I don’t know, buy my Catholic upbringing scared the shit out of me enough that I don’t even think about it! The chance that I would watch a movie like that, especially alone, is exactly 0. NO WAY.
By Suzi on 12.22.07 11:42 pm | Permalink
Me too! No way will I watch freaky spooky crazy shit like that either!
But it sure made me laugh, listening to you rant about it. Not so sure I believe in demons. But I definitely believe in mental illness. And medication. Lots and lots of medication.
By Shannon on 12.23.07 6:25 am | Permalink
“Oh my fucking fuck.”
Fell out of my chair laughing. Then read the rest.
*still giggling*
Hunky didn’t let me go see it in the theater (I don’t usually go to the theater anyway because they’re not captioned and it’s not fair to have Hunky interpret the whole time) but he did let me buy it when it came out on DVD. It wasn’t as scary as I thought it would be, but I watched it on a Saturday afternoon not in the middle of the night by myself you crazy woman!!! We’ll discuss demon possession in a couple weeks when your emotional scars heal a little from this traumatic experience!
By Dory on 12.23.07 10:35 am | Permalink
You are so going to hell! This is why I love you. Hope you’ve sufficiently recovered from being skeered.
By Jennifer on 12.23.07 11:41 am | Permalink
Dory…if we have to wait a few weeks to discuss demon possession does this mean that you are going to tell me that ITS REAL? Cuz I prefer to pretend as though I don’t care one way or another. I don’t want to say that it IS real, because then they will get me for believing, but I don’t want to say it ISN’T real, because then they will get me to prove a point. So, the minute it pops in my head I start with the LALALALALAs.
By Karly on 12.23.07 2:17 pm | Permalink
By the way, I’m replying in comments now. For today. We’ll see how long that lasts.
By Karly on 12.23.07 2:18 pm | Permalink
Oh Goody - I’ve always wanted to watch this movie! So glad I don’t have to watch it alone *grabs Karly’s hand*
By Jackie on 12.23.07 5:23 pm | Permalink
I’ll help you get through any scary movie. I love them !! LOL BTW….. new to your blog. Love your humor.
Jan
By Jan on 12.23.07 8:10 pm | Permalink
I spent the majority of my teenage years scared to death that I was going to be possessed by a demon. (That’s what you get when you use a Ouja board against your mother’s wishes - you get to live with the guilt and fear of having opened a portal to your soul to the world of evil demons where you know it’s just a matter of time before it happens.)
I haven’t watched that Emily Rose movie. I’m too scared.
By Leslie on 12.23.07 8:48 pm | Permalink
Jackie…it really was pretty good. You should go see it for real. You can live blog it, like me.
By Karly on 12.23.07 10:44 pm | Permalink
Jan, When I was a kid I LOVED scary movies, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve also gotten more chicken. I can only watch them if my husband is home and available to protect me!
By Karly on 12.23.07 10:45 pm | Permalink
Leslie, I totally did the Quija board too. I never thought that demons would possess me though. I was, however, always too (is it one “o” or two in this case?) scared to look in a dark mirror because Bloody Mary might get me. Oh, who am I kidding…I’m STILL to scared to look in a dark mirror.
By Karly on 12.23.07 10:46 pm | Permalink
How funny that your feed is called “FEED DEMON”. Ironic maybe? LOL!
By angel on 12.26.07 8:39 am | Permalink
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