I’m pretty sure that I’ve got PMS. Either that or I’ve suddenly morphed into some horrible, mean, and angry person. Or maybe I’ve just always been this way? Whatever. Its been too long since I complained, bullet style, on my blog.
- I hate grocery shopping. I used to love it. Now I hate it. First I have to plan meals to last for an entire week, because who knows when Cleatus will be off work long enough for me to go again sans kids. Then I get to the store and I have to put everything in to the cart and weave in and out of the idiots who block the aisle. THEN I have to wait in line and take everything back out of the cart. After I take it out of the cart and put it on the conveyor belt I have to put it BACK IN the cart and hand over a gob of money. Then I get out to the car and have to take the groceries BACK OUT OF THE CART and put them in my trunk. After I get home I have to get the fucking things out of my trunk and put them in the house. And then I have to take them out of the bags and put them in my cabinets/fridge/freezer. Its just a lot of in and out crap and it can get a wee bit tedious after awhile. SO. When I come home and Cleatus helps me carry the groceries in from the car I am very appreciative. But when Cleatus chooses the exact moment that all the bags are sitting in the kitchen waiting to be unloaded to return a phone I get a little pissy. I have touched these food items enough. I do not want to deal with it anymore. I also do not want the children weaving in and out of my legs while I am trying to put the shit away. I want Cleatus to return his phone calls AFTERWARDS. Mkay, Cleatus? You got that?
- Do you know how many different types of drinks I bought at the grocery tonight? EIGHT. I bought a gallon of milk, a gallon of water, a gallon of sweet tea, and bottle of V8, a bottle of Juicy Juice, a bottle of Gatorade, an 8 pack of Propel, and a 4 pack of Crystal Light. THAT IS RIDICULOUS and yet I don’t know what to cut out. We drink ALL of it! But, seriously, thats like 25 dollars JUST ON DRINKS! Plus I have to go back for more milk, water and tea every two days! Which means we really spend closer to FIFTY GOD DAMN DOLLARS a week on BEVERAGES. Very irritating.
- My house is old and dumb. We don’t have heating vents in our dining room, kitchen, or laundry room. To keep the house at a comfortable temperature we have to set our thermostat to EIGHTY. And I’m still cold.
- On Friday I moved every piece of furniture in my living room and swept and mopped underneath it all. (I filled an entire Wal-Mart sack with the garbage under our couches, chair, and entertainment center. I found UNOPENED stocking stuffers under there.) When Cleatus walked in the house after work I asked him if the living room looked extra sparkly clean. He said it looked “clean, I guess.” When I told him what I had done he pointed to one of our couches and said “Theres still something under that one.” Asshole.
- I have something on my mind that I REALLY need to vent about, but I can’t. I am not sure if the person I want to bitch about reads here or not. I know they know about my blog and I don’t THINK they read, but they could, and even if they don’t read it normally it would not surprise me AT ALL if they come here occasionally and just search for their name. Because they are an asshole like that. So, I am just going to say this: I have always disliked you. I’ve held it in check pretty well because I have to, but it kills me to spend any amount of time with you. I have no respect for you. I think you are greedy and fake. I think that you are a HORRIBLE parent and I hope that you burn in hell for the way you treated your children. You disgust me and pretending to like you is killing me. You make me sick.
Whew. I feel better now. Leave your rants in the comments.
Gina says:
My husband does the same thing with the groceries and I may actually kill him for it someday. I also think he purposely takes his time getting home after work, because that is the most hectic time of day – even though I have to rush out of work to be able to get the kids on time and deal with the insane time after we get home.
And hell – let’s not stop there- I’m on a roll. I REALLY hate it when he acts (or bitches about being) all stressed out because of the kids when he’s actually been with them for 15 minutes. Especially when this comes after I have taxied them all over town to parties and appointments and took them grocery shopping and bras shopping. I may also kill him for this.
Gina’s last blog post..Avoiding a Surrender to Terror and Other Bullshit
February 9th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
Alison of a Gun says:
I HATE when my housemate (I live in a duplex–she lives in the upstairs and I am downstairs) has a friend over, and the friend parks IN the driveway, instead of in one of the 4 spaces we have for the purpose of PARKING. I hate even more when I pull into the driveway, park, and that friend says to me “Oh, is it okay where I parked?”, and then I say, “Actually, we’re about to leave again and I reeeally don’t want to hit your car and it’s pretty tight quarters down here,” and then she says “Well I REALLY don’t want you to hit my car either.” DAMN, BITCH! Then don’t park in the exact fucking spot that might cause that to happen!
February 9th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
Chris H says:
I have few people I’d love to say just that too… what a bloody shame we have to pretend and put a public face on so often. It sucks. I hope your rant helped babe.
Chris H’s last blog post..I AM NOT BAKING BREAD, FULL STOP, END OF STORY.
February 9th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Lisa says:
I am so sick of our neighbors, who have a driveway (we don’t) but insist on parking on the street in front of our house! So then I have NO WHERE to park when I bring home all those groceries, so I have to lug them up the street because I am to polite to park in our other neighbors spot. One day I’m just going to park in the assholes driveway since they don;t seem to use it.!
February 10th, 2008 at 7:49 am
L the D says:
I like the last bullet. Good for you for telling it like it is!
L the D’s last blog post..So Who Wants Awkward?
February 10th, 2008 at 8:14 am
feener says:
i have written so many posts on food shopping and how much i HATE it !! of course i have to go food shopping today. i love how that is one of my breaks. yes i am thankful i go without the kids, but really i would much rather be getting my nails done with my free hour or 2 than food shopping.
feener’s last blog post..Valentine UPDATE
February 10th, 2008 at 8:21 am
LifeAsIKnowIt says:
I loathe grocery shopping. And, like you, I used to like it and now I absolutely hate it. And I hate planning a week’s worth of dinners.
So I hear ya’ on this one!
LifeAsIKnowIt’s last blog post..Winter Walk
February 10th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Leslie says:
Last night at Wal-Mart, I walked past a lady in the craft aisle. I’m a pretty wide load right now with the giant baby belly and all, so I said “Excuse me” as I walked past, because I ended up brushing against her just a little. (She and her cart were hanging out in the middle of the aisle.) She sighed and rolled her eyes. A few minutes later, I was at the end cap looking at some Valentine stuff and she pushed by me, moving me forward so far that my belly was pressing against the shelves. Then, she sighed, rolled her eyes again and said, “Take up the whole space why don’t ya!” I wanted to knock her down and stand on her face. What a bitch!!!!
Also, your last bullet? I have a similar rant I’d love to put out there – mine could probably go a whole post. But I’m too chicken. Because I know the fucker it’s aimed toward reads my blog and believes EVERYTHING I write has something to do with her. Some people are just assholes.
Leslie’s last blog post..Buck The Monkey
February 10th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Maria says:
I bet that rant felt great.
I need to do that right about now myself.
Maria’s last blog post..Potty Training Is Done and Yes I will Take A Bow
February 10th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
Amy says:
Amen to the grocery comment. I too used to love going out and getting all of the things that my family needed for the week, but now I absolutely hate trecking through the miles of idiots to get to the tooth paste where someone is always in my freaking way. Plus I am six months pregnant and by the time I have fought the insane and incompetent for an hour the last thing I feel like doing is lugging all of those damn groceries into the house. You know what else I hate…..laundry.
February 10th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
baseballmom says:
I’m with Chris H…sometimes I just get so tired of faking it when I hate someone and really want to bitch slap them. Also, Husband sometimes gets pissed when I call him from in front of the house to come out and get some of the groceries. Fuck that….if I just spent all that time shopping for the shit, and can’t carry all of it up the stairs, then you can damn well get your shoes on and get your ass of the couch and carry some! Hate grocery shopping.
baseballmom’s last blog post..Bases covered
February 11th, 2008 at 2:51 am
nan says:
Gee, I feel less alone in my grocery hatred now. You know what I just had to start doing? Shopping in TWO DIFFERENT places!! One, once a month for cheap cleaners and paper stuff and deals, AND one for everything else. It’s self-flagellation, that’s what it is!
nan’s last blog post..and in international news today…
February 11th, 2008 at 11:07 am
candygirlflies says:
Babe–
F*ck groceries– get thee to a liquor store.
xoxo CGF
candygirlflies’s last blog post..I doubt OHIP would cover this, either…
February 11th, 2008 at 12:57 pm
ali says:
i HATE buying drinks. not only do i have to guy 5 million different drinks…they are so ridiculously HEAVY. boo!
ali’s last blog post..It’s the Monday Boo/Yay Game!!
February 11th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Jasmine says:
Holy Rant-o-saurus Bat Man! I’ll bet THAT felt good.
You know… you could save that $50 every single week (and buy new shoes instead) by just not buying any of that stuff. None of it.
Drink water.
Your bodies and your minds and your check book will love and thank you for it. No joke.
Think you could do it?
Jasmine’s last blog post..things left unsaid
February 11th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
A Mom Anonymous says:
Well damn. I used to like grocery shopping until I read that. Now you made me realize how f’ing monotonous it actually is!!!
Love the last bullet. For the sake of my family I really should start doing that and pretending I like the IL’s instead of just telling them that stuff to their faces. Oooops!
February 11th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
Mrs. Schmitty says:
That’s it…let it out….Let.It.All.OUT! It’s healthy to vent, I hope it helped!!
I’d vent too…but I don’t think there is enough room in the comment box!
Mrs. Schmitty’s last blog post..The Truth, The Whole Truth, And Nothing But The Truth
February 11th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
theotherbear says:
I can soooo relate to your rant. I’d join in but I don’t want to get all worked up about it!
theotherbear’s last blog post..Under Pressure
February 11th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Lottifish says:
I hate grocery shopping too. I’m always tempted to try ordering my groceries online and having them delivered. Have you ever thought about this? Let me know if you try it.
Lottifish’s last blog post..I Love Al Gore
February 11th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
jen says:
I can help with the tea thing. Buy the ‘family size’ tea packs–not more, but larger tea bags. Then take one of the empty gallon jugs you’ve got around and rinse it out( or be like me and use an old wine jug–you’ve got those, too, right?). Boil a quart of water in a pot, add three tea bags. Let it stew and cool off. While that happens, fill the jug halfway. Then pour the tea in. Then fill the jug. Leave it on the counter to finish cooling, then put in the fridge. Cost: about 3.50 for many, many gallons of tea.
For sweet, put about 3/4c sugar in when you fill the jug halfway. This will be almost as sweet as the stuff at the store.
In the summer it’s easier: Fill jug, put three teabags in, put outside. When you remember, go get it and weasel the bags out of the jar. Tea! Since I’m in TX, this works nearly year round.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Jerseygirl89 says:
Great rant! I wouldn’t even know where to start. Except that I hate how cold it is in our basement because of the broken window, which we can’t afford to get fixed and had to be broken so a cop could get in because I locked myself out (and the kids were in) because we can’t afford to get the front door lock fixed because we are broke because some company, whose owners I’m related to, hasn’t paid Hubby in a long while. And I can’t complain that much because of the relationship factor. And I’m feeling a little bitter. . .can you tell?
Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..Looking For A Web Host?
February 12th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Vicky says:
I loved the last bullet. I have the same situation too. The person I want to rant about spoils her kids and never disciplines them. Her oldest will knock down the youngest and she is like “stop that” The oldest will whack the youngest again in about a minutes time. I’m thinking how about a time out or something. Geesh! Tell him to stop is obviously not working.
Vicky’s last blog post..Pregnancy Test Results Today!
February 12th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Patti says:
Oh how I HATE grocery shopping! Always have, always will. And I write to PeaPod almost weekly, begging them to deliver the crap to me. But no, they don’t service my zip code (less than 1/2 a mile, I may have to move).
And you saved the best for last. The truth will set you free!
Patti’s last blog post..Look Ma, No Hands!
February 16th, 2008 at 9:46 pm