It’ll Only Hurt For A Second

March 4, 2008 | Filed in: Bringin' Tears To My Eyes, Mah Babies

Sometimes when Cindy-Lu gets scared or nervous or hurt just enough that she has to let us know but not so hurt that she needs to cry she will giggle like a little terrified maniac. It is such a funny little laugh, but it breaks my heart knowing that it isn’t from happiness, but from some emotion that she doesn’t know how to express. You can see in her eyes that she is feeling something and it is confusing to her. At three years old she just isn’t quite sure how to handle it yet. And so it bubbles up in the form of a scared giggle.
Tonight I caused that little giggle and then I betrayed her trust. It was something so silly, so trivial, but the guilt is tremendous.

Earlier today Cleatus was trying to leave for work and Cindy-Lu was blocking the door telling him he couldn’t go. He pulled the door open and somehow caught her foot under it and the door scraped the top of her foot. It wasn’t a bad scrape, but there was a little blood and she was crying and very upset about it. I went and got a band aid for her thinking that would make her feel better. Because I’m cheap I don’t buy children’s band aids (also because neither of my kids ever get hurt enough to need a band aid), so I drew a little smiley face on it for her. (Yes, I am a genius.) She felt a little better but then started in with her “I’m sick” speech and began requesting medicine to make her foot feel better. She is a drama queen.

Later this evening Eeyore thought she asked him to pull her band aid off and started to rip one side off. She freaked out. Those band aids hurt, yo. I fixed it for her, but it wouldn’t stick very well. All night long she was having me push it back on to her little foot. I asked her if she wanted a new one, but she remembered that it hurt when Eeyore had pulled off the first bit and she wasn’t about to go through that again.

I’d fixed her band aid for her a few times when it came undone again. I told her to come to me and she did that nervous little laugh and said “You just going to pix it Mommy!” Well, I wasn’t just going to just fix it. I was going to rip it off and give her a new one. But I nodded my head and told her I was going to fix it. She still wasn’t sure if she should trust me so she slowly walked over to me, laughing that little laugh and sat down next to me.

I smiled gently and I ripped her band aid off. She screamed and she sobbed and I wanted to cry along with her.

It was just a band aid. It wasn’t that big of a deal. And yet, it was. She was nervous, she wasn’t sure if she could trust me and what did I teach her?

I taught her that she couldn’t trust me.

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D’OH!!

sugarplumsmom’s last blog post..I like you SO much

I think you taught her that sometimes things hurt, and sometimes you get to choose if it’s a quick hurt or a hurt that keeps annoying you and lasts a long time. Remind her of this when she’s dating her first loser. She’ll thank you for the lesson.

Look at it this way, this is one time against the thousands of ways she’s already learned to trust you. I know you feel bad, but she probably won’t even remember by tomorrow.

Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..Should I Mail This?

I knew someone who thought it was important for kids to learn that they can’t trust their parents so he stood at the bottom of the stairs and told his kids to jump - and then didn’t catch them! At least you’re not psychotic! You couldn’t leave a nasty bandaid on their forever.
Shannon’s last blog post..miscellaneous

Ouch! I agree that this won’t affect how she trusts you…but I think that Vaseline will loosen up a band-aid and help it come off pain-free if you work it in (for future reference). Haven’t tried it myself, though…

Oh, Karly! I know how you feel. It’ll be alright, though. I don’t think it’s as bad as feels right now. The great thing about your kids is they’re the people quickest to forgive you. She’s probably given it a lot less thought than you have.

When I was a kid and my mom had to pull off a band aid or put medicine on a cut, she’d tell me, “Now, this is gonna hurt. On the count of three, SCREAM!” She’d count to three and I’d scream and she do the deed. I was always so focused on screaming really loud that I barely felt it. I do the same with Julia. It seems to work.

Leslie’s last blog post..On Why Our Marriage Works

poor cindy-lu. but she will get over this. really.

janet’s last blog post..She makes me an offer I can’t refuse

Jerseygirl, I know. I’m sure she already forget. I’m retarded. I just wish I would have said I’m pulling this off now instead of LYING to her. Poor little baby.

Shannon: Um, wow. He sure sounds like a nice guy.

Kelley, thanks for the tip!

Leslie, what a good idea! I remember getting my ears pissed with a friend and her mom when I was in junior high and we both asked the mom if we could say “shit” when they did it and she said yes. It totally took our minds off the pain being able to cuss in front of the mom. LOL. Kids are dumb.

Cindy-Lu will be fine! So will you. I totally have done something similar and felt just as badly. Carson is fully recovered and doesn’t remember what I did.

Jennifer’s last blog post..French Lick Sounds Kinda Dirty

Oh, Karly, don’t be too hard on yourself. We all do it at one time or another. She still knows she can trust you.
(and ha, ha to ears pissed )

Jackie’s last blog post..My Question to You

Been there! Done that! I’m a very untrustworthy mom. That said, I have become wiser. Next time give her a mani/pedi. Her feet will need to soak and off that bandaid will go. Then paint her toenails. The girl won’t even realize she’s been tricked.

Now the ladybug nail job doesn’t work so well for boys. Just saying!

Scout’s honor’s last blog post..DO Sweat The Small Stuff

I can understand how you feel but I bet she’ll forget about it in a few days. Hang in there, I know it seems bad now.

Lottifish’s last blog post..Kids are Scary

Jackie, Hahahaha. I couldn’t figure out what the hell you were talking about with ears pissed so I read everything again and again and finally I saw it. I’m dumb. PIERCED, okay?

Awww, she totally trusts you. One little band-aid rip isn’t going to undo your years of love and trust!
I was wondering about the ear pissing as well. Thank goodness that got cleared up!

It sucks being a mom sometimes, doesn’t it? Don’t worry about her trusting you, she always will.

Mrs. Schmitty’s last blog post..The Week From Hell

She’ll be over it soon - if she’s not by now. It was a little white lie, it’s not like you told her the cat ran away when you actually gave it away.

My mom did that when I was 7 and I still trust her.

I told Carter yesterday that we were going to play with a friend of his but instead took him to daycare. It was all I could do to get him to stop friggin’ whining and get his ass in the car! LOL

sam’s last blog post..Attention Span of a Three Year Old on Crack

Sometimes, tough love is rough. Funny that I clearly remember one time my Mom did that to me. Looking back I realized that she HAD to pull it off, quick is the best way. I’m sure she won’t hold it against you and honestly, if that’s the only thing you ever do that you think might mess with her head, you’re in good shape.
I’m sorry you had to go through that with her today.

Pam’s last blog post..Split Personality

She’ll be fine. More than likely, she’ll forget about it by tomorrow. If not, she’ll probably take it off during a bath and tell you all about how the scrape went away.

Terri H’s last blog post..The Ultimate Blog Party, 2008!

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