So. Today was the first day of Vacation Bible School. It was, you know, bible-y. And there were a lot of kids. I was in charge of snacks and games and have you ever tried playing Follow The Leader with a group of three year olds? I don’t recommend it, especially not after loading them up with hawaiian punch and m&m’s. (Let it be noted that I was not in charge of SUPPLYING or CHOOSING the snack, just the adminstering of.)
Some of the kids were cute (not as many as you would think) and some were snotty and screamy. I’d like to state for the record that I have no problems wiping snot off of my children’s faces, sometimes even looking in to the used tissue with a weird sense of satisfaction, but when it comes to other people’s children? Wiping snot from their faces is a bit disgusting. It makes me shudder just thinking of all the snot I squeezed from noses today.
There was one little girl, though, that I fell in love with. She walked in the room and I about fell over. She reminded me so much of Cindy-Lu when she was younger. Her sweet little voice, her chubby hands, her sturdy little body. She was a bit of a whiner, just like Cindy-Lu, but she would stop whining the minute I picked her up and cuddled her. I did a lot of cuddling with her. At one point my heart started breaking when I remembered that Cleatus and I would never have another sweet little toddler running around our house, but then one of the screamers wandered over to me and I remembered that I don’t actually like kids, so I put the sweet girl down and went back to my job of pretending to be cheerful and loving towards all the kids. Even the screamy ones.
The highlight of the day was when this adorable little seventh grade helper asked me what grade I was in. Well, either that or getting to stare at the sexy daddy helper that monitored the playground. It’s a toss up.
shoeaddict says:
Oh please don’t let me have a gross screamy ugly kid.
Sexy daddy helper- fun fun fun.
shoeaddicts last blog post..The Best I Got Right Now
June 15th, 2009 at 3:15 pm
MamaBug says:
I’ve been wonderin’ where you’ve been…and now I know it’s at the playground ogling (?) all those hot daddies.
Wish there were some sexy daddy helpers at our VBS. Just the usual ones, and the pastor. And that is just plain ol’ wrong.
June 15th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
Mrs Soup says:
I totally agree with you on the wiping other kids snot. It’s so gross! But my own? I love it! I love getting the boogers out of her nose….wiping up the drool….love love love it!
Mrs Soups last blog post..Weekend Experience
June 15th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
Aliceson says:
I hope God is keeping score because seriously, vacation bible school? You must be way up there on the “how much does God love me?” scale.
Oh, And I totally agree with other kids’ snot noses. So Gross, yet I’d practically lick my own kids snot noses just so they wouldn’t have to be seen in public with a green drippy boog.
Alicesons last blog post..Monday Garden Club
June 15th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Jennifer W. says:
I love my own child with a passion that terrifies me. There are even one or two other children I also adore but the rest need to zip their mouths and stay hidden behind their mother. On second thought, their mothers are probably just as annoying. Oh, hot playground daddies? Yes, please.
Jennifer W.s last blog post..In which I scream to the mountain tops in ecstatic disbelief
June 15th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
Cameron says:
HELLO, Mrs. Robinson….picking up 7th graders now, huh? You cougar, you!!!
Camerons last blog post..Congratulations….It’s A Gay!!!
June 15th, 2009 at 6:54 pm
Jill says:
Look at you being all bible-y and shi… I mean stuff!
Jills last blog post..Just do it. No seriously, shut up about it and just do it already.
June 15th, 2009 at 7:33 pm
Nan says:
Does this mean God is reading your blog now? Giving them junk food is a great idea! All of the kids are going to BEG to go to church and be confirmed, they probably think that communion is cheezies and coke.
Ooooooo, sorry God, I couldn’t resist!
Nans last blog post..More Action Weekends
June 15th, 2009 at 8:22 pm
amy @ milk breath and margaritas says:
The Lord is blessing you with this opportunity to truly own, to live out, to fully claim, your blog title.
heh.
amy @ milk breath and margaritass last blog post..Balsamic & Garlic Grilled Chicken with Baked Rum Pineapple
June 15th, 2009 at 8:47 pm
Leslie says:
Julia was very screamy this evening. I was very shut the fuck uppity. Of course, I didn’t SAY shut the fuck up. At least not with my mouth. Just my eyes. My eyes can say shut the fuck up.
It’s a good thing I don’t help with Vacation Bible School.
Leslies last blog post..I Keep Humming That Mungo Jerry Song*
June 15th, 2009 at 11:38 pm
baseballmom says:
Dude, you’re like a saint or something. Mother Teresa ain’t got nothin’ on you! I remember the days of co op preschool, and how I couldn’t wait to get the hell outta there…partly because I was worried about Alex telling someone “Screw You!” or “Asshole”, or “Motherfucker”. Luckily it never happened (that I know of) but still.
baseballmoms last blog post..The big chill
June 16th, 2009 at 1:00 am
Secret Mom Thoughts says:
Glad you made it through the first day. The screamy kids always remind me why I’m done having kids.
Secret Mom Thoughtss last blog post..Ticked Off Tuesday
June 16th, 2009 at 10:26 am
Heather, Queen of Shake Shake says:
Hot daddies are allowed at vacation bible school? I may have to get all bible-y myself
Heather, Queen of Shake Shakes last blog post..They say parenting is the hardest job ever, but let’s establish a pecking order anyway
June 16th, 2009 at 11:28 am
anna see says:
last time i helped with vbs i was in the nursery. other kids’ noses aren’t anything compared to other kids’ behinds.
hope the rest of your week goes great, you hot 7th grader!
anna sees last blog post..A Lot Changes in 20 Years
June 16th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Kelley @ Magnetoboldtoo says:
You are totally doing a Dooce. Blogging about your job and then they will find it and fire you and then you will make MILLIONS!!
June 16th, 2009 at 10:48 pm
Tosha says:
You’re a saint! I couldn’t have even pretended well enough to make it through the VBS thing.. I have 4 kids of my own.. I don’t really like kids. Even more so other people’s kids..
Toshas last blog post..the video game did it! NOT ME!
June 17th, 2009 at 12:37 am
David King says:
Did she ask you what grade you were in based on looks or intelligence? Guess which one I’m thinking.
Bahahaha
June 30th, 2009 at 11:28 am